The first time you log on to a virtual Shabbat service, you may feel a little awkward. That is normal. It is also temporary. Within ten minutes, most people forget they are on a screen at all.
Here is what to expect.
You Sign On a Few Minutes Early
Like any service, it is good to arrive a few minutes before things start. At Sim Shalom, Shabbat begins Friday at 7:00 p.m. Eastern. People start logging in around 6:50. You will see faces appearing in little squares — some familiar regulars, some newcomers like you. The rabbi welcomes people by name as they arrive.
You do not have to turn your camera on. You do not have to say anything. You can simply be there.
Candle Lighting Opens the Service
Shabbat begins with light. Many congregants light their own candles at home and bring the flames into view of the camera. From kitchens in Brooklyn, living rooms in Tel Aviv, dining tables in São Paulo, candles flicker across the screen at the same moment.
This is one of the quiet miracles of an online synagogue. Shabbat does not enter through one door. It enters through every door at once.
The Liturgy in Hebrew and English
The traditional Shabbat liturgy is sung and recited in both Hebrew and English. If you do not read Hebrew, you can follow in English. If you do not know any of it, you can listen. There is no test.
Rabbi Steven Blane leads the music himself — he is a working singer-songwriter as well as a rabbi, and the melodies are part of what makes Sim Shalom feel like Sim Shalom. Some songs are traditional. Some he wrote. All of them are meant to be sung along with, badly if necessary.
A Short Teaching
Roughly halfway through, the rabbi offers a d’var Torah — a brief teaching on the week’s Torah portion. These are short, plainspoken, and rooted in the news of the world rather than in scholarly footnotes. You do not need a Jewish education to follow them. You only need to be paying attention to your life.
Shared Joys and Sorrows
Before the Mourner’s Kaddish, congregants are invited to share — a birthday, a yahrzeit, a piece of good news, a worry. Names are spoken aloud. The community holds them.
If you have lost someone and want their name said, you say so. If you are celebrating, you celebrate. This is the part of the service many people end up loving most.
Kaddish and Closing
We say Kaddish together for those we have lost. We close with the Aleinu and a final blessing. The service is about an hour.
After the Service
When the service ends, the rabbi stays on. So do many congregants. People chat. They ask questions. They introduce themselves. It is the digital version of the kiddush table.
You can stay. You can leave. There is no pressure either way.
What to Bring
- Candles, if you want to light them
- A glass of wine or grape juice for Kiddush
- Challah, if you have it — bread of any kind, if you do not
- An open heart
That is it. No prayer book required. No dress code. No expectations.
Who Will Be There
A mix. Lifelong Jews and Jews by choice. Interfaith couples. Seekers. The unaffiliated. Some weeks there are college students. Some weeks there are grandparents. Many people come alone and discover they are not alone at all.
Joining for the First Time
Sign up at simshalom.com and you will receive the link. Show up at 7:00 p.m. Eastern on Friday. Come as you are.
If you have never been to any kind of Shabbat service before, this is a good way to start. If you have been to a hundred and want one that meets you where you actually live — online, busy, far from family — this is also a good way to start.